We finally made it back home yesterday after 11 days of traveling.  We added a second destination last minute and ended up traveling to Western Illinois (Moline, Rock Island) to attend my Grandparents 50th Wedding Anniversary celebration.  There was time for just the wife and I, and then equal time spent seeing my extended family, which we had not seen in more than a year.  In the short time we were away from our son, it seems that he got smarter by the day and learned to make all kinds of new noises.  Anyway, that is a short summary of the past 11 days.

I give you that information to get to the main point, why we went to Illinois.  We decided with a couple days left up north to cut our trip short and pick up our son and drive the 7 hours to Illinois on a quick last minute decision.  We had already told most of the family we would not make it, because I was out of time off at work.  However, thanks to the kindness of our employers we were able to take a couple extra days and make the trip.  With failing health reports on my Grandfather and the seriousness of his condition we felt it was important to see him and for him to meet our son.  So we went.

It is hard to see someone struggling with an incurable disease, even harder when it is a member or your family, and harder yet when it is towards the end.  Emotions were mostly disguised or hidden most of the day, except some few moments towards the end, but they were still felt in the air.  The awkward silence, distance, and feeling of that person not quite being who they once were was enough to shift the mood of celebration to a mood of somberness.  Yet we all would not have missed it for the world.  Strange how things work out that way.

The hardest part, though I found in all of this, was watching the progress of a disease take down someone I care about, while knowing that it too is in the process of taking me down.  It was a glimpse into my future.  A wake up call, hopefully, for me to do the things I can do to avoid the speed at which it controls my life and tears down my body.

It is just another reminder, another person, that has been torn down by Diabetes for me to witness.  Still as humans we are resistant to change even when confronted with such vivid examples of why we should not do certain things.  I don’t know if it is a need to try it out our-self, even when we know the outcome, or if we simply subconsciously don’t think it will happen the same way to us.  I hope that this, the most painful and personal example, will be something that I can use to focus my energy and create a better outcome for myself and my family.